Archive for May, 2008

31
May
08

arg: week 0, days 0-1


Week 0, Day 0: Thursday, May 29, 2008.

 

2 a.m (NY) — Flying over Panama thereabouts. I should be asleep. Instead, my intro: My words are rusty. I am rusty. Life is a poorly written book; I am the writer and the protagonist; and this is a narrative conflict of man versus himself. To come in the following pages: every possible bloated and overprecious cliché about change, the world, its strangers, and the wanderer. Look for blatant and shallow themes regarding the equally harsh and purifying nature of discovery. Look for ill attempts to make sense of the intangible. My search is not for Truth, but merely something true – in life, in myself. Futile as my efforts are, they are, however, above all, necessary. May I finally find that which I am seeking. Now, to dream, perchance to sleep.

 

Week 0, Day 1: Friday, May 30, 2008.

 

9:30 a.m. (BA) — Landed.

 

10:50 a.m. — Sitting on shuttle, heading downtown. I’m not retarded. I remember some Spanish and managed to not look like an idiot at the airport. My first feat of Day 1. Immigration took longer than expected. Long line for exchange. Then organized all necessary things in the airport restrooms.

 

12:50 p.m. — Somewhat settled into hostel. Nice boy Santiago the hostel caretaker welcomed me. Going to see what there is to see.

 

 

4:00 p.m. — Return to Estoril. First walked silly, young, vegetarian UC-Berkeley girl to her hostel. Her first time off the North American continent, was desperately clutching Lonely Planet guidebook the whole walk through. I told her to calm down and drop the book. She was bewildered – and ended up saying nothing as I bid her a quick farewell. Long walk down Avenida 9 de Julio – the widest street in the world. Took first pictures of trip at Congress. Browsed used books on the street. Attempted small talk. Watched an elderly gentleman play two games of chess at a time.

 

 

8:45 p.m. — Just returned from café downstairs. Empanadas de pollo. Yum. First Arg. meal. Had a good, casual conversation with a fellow hostelmate, Eva from Boston. Liberal, vegetarian, travels much and shares some of my loves and hates. Talked to an old man, who guessed I was Chinese. Gave me a sweet kiss on the cheek, which I returned, when I left with a “buenas noches.” A pity I must leave Buenos Aires tomorrow, but all’s better if I meet my fellow volunteers in Cordoboa sooner than later. Took a shower earlier. Watched television with hostelmates in the common room. Talking about literature and films with Esteban who works at the hostel.

 

1:50 a.m. — Talked, talked, talked. And listened to crazy Kerouac stories from two Californian sisters – Andrea and Justine. Kerouac would have sat, drunk, and smoked all night with them, just listening and absorbing. Crazy stories from around the continent. John the Norwegian. They’ve all been traveling since March. All young people –- my age or older. But I think for the first time, I experienced a degree of what Kerouac records in On the Road. Amazing, hearing all those stories. Too many for me to write down, but the evening was the perfect preamble to my own adventure, which begins tomorrow evening. It will be more tame, of course, because I consider myself more tame, but I hope I reach a point at which I am just exploding with stories like the sisters were.

28
May
08

eire: eight, nine, ten


Belfast, April 2008.
(Okay, so I have more pictures of Belfast, but they’re still in my film camera, and I haven’t finished off the 36-exposure roll.)

Friday, April 25th, 2008.

9:00 a.m. — Out. Walk to Busaras for bus to Belfast. Gulped down chocolate croissant for breakfast.

10:00 a.m. — Bus leave Dublin. So punctual. Now I understand the meaning of keeping the trains running on time. Not like North America where everything runs late. I should move to Europe where punctuality is precious.

11:00 a.m. — Yellow fields of something. So yellow. Giving it all up is the trick, of course. How to give it all up. The life I have been living since childhood – since my earliest memories. How do I give it up? This is the question I must answer. Maybe it can’t be answered. It can only be done – at the moment, without thinking, without analyzing and contemplating day and night. People keep telling me that I don’t have to give it up for my whole life, that I can return after saving the world (such as it is). A cop-out. They don’t understand that there is no way to return. ”How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on, when in your heart you begin to understand there is no going back? There are some things that time cannot mend, some hurts that go too deep, that have taken hold.”

12:30 p.m. — Arrive in Belfast. Hunting for murals.

1:30 p.m. — Walk up Shankill Road to find Peace Wall. Quite taxing. Mixed directions and such. The locals have a harder look. Faces seem darker. More uncompromising. The city seems tense. Maybe it’s just the rain. Awkwardness I can’t pin down. Could be my own flawed imagination, of course.

2:00 p.m. — Peace Wall.


Belfast, April 2008.

3:00 p.m. — Downhill. In KFC because I have to piss. The song playing is Eminem’s “8 Mile.” One young man at the counter. Majority of tables still have garbage and leftovers. Most depressing KFC I’ve seen yet. Then again, how many have I really been in?

6:00 p.m. — On bus to get back.

9:30 p.m. — Back. Passing out.

Saturday, April 26th, 2008.

10:30 a.m. — Out for the last full day.

12 p.m. — Wandering streets patiently. Postcards.

1:30 p.m. — A restuarant called The Shack. Sausages and mashed potatoes.

2:30 p.m. — Local bookstore: The Winding Stairs. Beckett’s Disjecta. Wandering and sitting by the River Liffey, watching people cross Ha’penny Bridge.

4:00 p.m. — Leon. Pastry and coffee.

5:30 p.m. — Sitting on the Grand Canal. Nowhere to go, nowhere to be. I judge people too harshly. I expect too much from people — friends and strangers — and too frequently get disappointed. My fault. We expect too little from each other. Was it always like this? We should expect more from each other — and deliver. Unreasonable? I don’t think so — not entirely. Though perhaps too severe, as Professor said. Of course, he was speaking in regard to my dislike of Michael Douglas’ acting. Still, he’s right. But I am just as — and some days, even more — severe with myself. I already consider myself too lax. I need to pull myself together. Read more, write more, learn more.

2:00 a.m. — Finally asleep. Cripes.

Sunday, April 27th, 2008.

6:30 a.m. — To airport. Nearly miss the shuttle. Running down the street with luggage. Maniac.

8:00 a.m. — Hideous delay. Will not depart until 1:45 p.m. Shitty. Full Irish breakfast with Continental’s compliments. Thanks, Continental.

9:30 a.m. — Dying. Kill me.

10:00 a.m. — Watching two cute guys get on a flight to Prague. Oh, take me with you.

12:15 p.m — Waiting, still waiting for Godot’s plane to arrive. Bought a bottle of Bushmill’s at duty free. So exhausted. Can’t sleep. Must wait to get on plane first.

3:20 p.m. — Boarded. At long fucking last. Conversation with an Irishman. He prefers Asia to the West. Huh. Apparently, few Irish actually in Dublin center. Most are Eastern Europeans with three-year work visas.

7:05 p.m. — Sleeping on and off. Wasteful airlines. No way to get around it, I suppose. When they hand out the food, they can’t possibly take it back — even if one doesn’t open it. Depressing.

6:15 p.m. (New York) — Landed.

8:00 p.m. — Home. To quote Ulysses, episode “Ithaca”:  .


“Leaving Ireland” - April 2008.

24
May
08

recreational liar, wannabe poet, amateur photographer, peripatetic, modest artist, ex-Protestant, part-time alcoholic, word junkie, obsessive compulsive, music addict, masochist, nervous conversationalist, slow reader, harsh critic, pessimistic idealist, clumsy musician, glutton, courteous driver.

impatient, severe, dependable, punctual, flexible, competant, rational, limited, cliched, self-deprecating, over-eager, well-tempered.

listen to the same song for hours on end, shower with the lights off no matter time of day, sleep with my head under the pillow, seldom brush my hair, enjoy an occasional nightmare, force myself to not return emails so quickly, memorize world capitals for sport.

Prague, Budapest, Istanbul.

love: well-crafted commercials, impossibly long walks home at ungodly hours, secret pockets, atlases, classy postcards, clever allusions.

hate: biased newsreporting, rudeness, prepackaged atheism, obnoxious complaints against government, baked potatoes, low-quality duct tape.

never: gone fishing, read an entire Austen novel, lost my keys.

21
May
08

let me take you down

living is easy with eyes closed

18
May
08

you never give me your money

 

out of college
money spent
see no future
pay no rent
all the money’s gone
nowhere to go

except Argentina

final dates: Thursday, May 29, 2008 – Monday, August 25, 2008.